Shattering The Limits

CHALLENGING AND OVERCOMING BARRIERS THAT HOLD YOU BACK.

“Every decision in your life is controlled by your beliefs and values. You may not realize it, but you have the power to choose what you believe about your life, people, money, and health. You can either choose beliefs that limit you, or beliefs that empower you to move toward success.” -Tony Robbins

If this article made its way to you, it’s likely that you recognize the immense power of Tony’s words. This article is designed to illustrate how our core beliefs can ignite a fire within us or dismantle any thought of a compelling future.

Let’s get started.

Five words dismantled any thought I had of a compelling future the moment they were spewed from my guidance counselor’s mouth. “You are not college material.” -Mr. King

That was the moment in time that I knew in my soul if it was going to be, it was up to me. If I allowed his voice to rent space in my head, my power would be gone, along with the future I had dreamt of as far back as I can remember. My beloved grandmother traveled by train during the Great Depression to Penn State Teacher’s College. She was my role model. There was no other choice. I would go to college!

Mr. King’s words sent me on a lifelong journey of personal growth. At that point, it became necessary to face my limiting beliefs head on. I needed to shatter them! My future path depended upon it! Mr. King’s words sent me on a life-long journey of personal development. Since those early years, I’ve earned a bachelor’s and a master’s degree. I’m a Certified Master Life Coaching. I often think of sending Mr. King a thank you letter. I owe him a debt of gratitude. Had it not been for him, I may never have been faced with such an adversarial moment in my life.

UNMASKING OUR LIMITING BELIEFS

Would it surprise you to learn that our core belief system is established during the crucial early years of birth to age seven or eight? During these formative years, our brains are sponges, soaking up everything we see, hear, and feel. Our brains are highly receptive and adaptable during these early years. Our impressions and observations of family, caregivers and society are downloaded into our hard drive, i.e., brain.

When we consider that our core belief system consists of, our beliefs about ourselves, others, and the world, we can see the MAGNITUDE of it. This is how we perceive ourselves and the world around us. If we lived in a world of scarcity and lack, our belief system will most likely center around inadequacy and not being or having enough. If we grew up in a world where there was enough love and money to go around, our perception would be much different. We would carry an abundance mindset, vs a scarcity mindset.

As we grow up, our subconscious mind is continually looking for evidence to support our core belief system.

The real question is how do you get rid of something that you have held as a core belief or a conviction, but it is not good for you? First, we must unmask the truth. The truth will set us free.

Unveiling the Myths: 10 Pervasive Limiting Beliefs

I am not good enough.

I do not deserve success.

I am too old; I am too young.

Money does not grow on trees.

I am not talented enough; I am not smart enough.

I will never find love.

Success is only for other people, not me.

It is not possible.

Others will not like it if I follow my passions.

I must keep everyone happy; what will people think?

Action Steps:

  • Identify your limiting beliefs. Think of this as a brain dump.

  • Identify 3 of the MOST prominent limiting beliefs.

  • Think of the recurring patterns that emerge from the limiting beliefs. Identify your self-talk connected to your MOST prominent limiting beliefs.

GROWTH GOBLINS

Limiting beliefs have the power to destroy our future. Empowering beliefs have the power to create a compelling future. For real change to happen, we must be clear on this point. It is the foundation for our future. My dream was to go to college. Mr. King’s words and my limiting beliefs could have stolen my dreams. I pushed through and so can you. “Whether you say you can or you can’t, you are right.” -Henry Ford

Action Steps:

  • List 3 things that you have not pursued or followed through on because of your limiting beliefs:

  • If you could go back in time and change one decision or action, what would it be?

  • If money was no object, what are your big, fat, arduous dreams?

BELIEF BUSTERS

Imagine our limiting beliefs are like a tabletop and the evidence supporting the beliefs are akin to the table’s legs. Our brain finds legs to back up whatever we believe. We look for evidence. Here is the cool part. Just like a table will fall if the legs are knocked out, we can do this with limiting beliefs. How? By creating doubt. The key is to question the evidence, remove the glue that supports it and adopt a more empowering belief to replace it with.

Action Steps:

  • List all the things that support the beliefs. What is the evidence (the table legs). Here is my example. I was told I was not college material because I ranked in the bottom half of my class, my SATs were an embarrassment and my lack of commitment to my academics was no secret. I took that statement and stacked it up against my core limiting belief system, “Mr. King was right. I am not going to college. I will never live out my dream.” I had the evidence!

  • Peel back the emotional superglue. The truth is we can become attached to limiting beliefs and there is an emotional payoff. Imagine supergluing the legs of a table to the floor.

  • List the emotions you experience when you hold onto the limiting beliefs.

  • In what ways do these limiting beliefs keep you safe, i.e., avoiding failure, keep you comfortable, provide a sense of control?

  • What would you have to face if you let go of the beliefs? Time to celebrate! You are now peeling off the super glue and dismantling the table.

CREATE DOUBT - ASK QUESTIONS

Action Steps:

  • Ask Questions. If you question enough, you will create a little doubt; it is not for certain. The goal is to create a small crack and create doubt. In my example, I was told (and believed) I was not college material. What if I was college material? What harm would it do to apply and let the college decide my fate? What evidence did I have only based upon Mr. King’s opinion? Could there be other options? Turns out there were other options. My acceptance was conditional. I had to be in good academic standing by the end of my first semester. Had I not questioned Mr. King’s perception and my own limiting beliefs, my dream would have never come to volition.

  • What evidence do I have to support this belief that I am holding onto?

  • Could it be that the beliefs were created when I was a young child and no longer serve me?

  • To what degree are the limiting beliefs hindering me from living my life purpose and passions?

  • Identify alternative, empowering beliefs. Write the new beliefs in all CAPS! This is the beginning of shattering your limits.

FLIP IT AROUND

Now it is time to build supporting evidence for your new beliefs. Tony Robbins refers to this as stacking the good. It is time to stack all the things in support of your empowering beliefs. You are creating legs to the table that are strong, supportive, and empowering.

Action Steps

  • Create new legs. List all the things that support your new beliefs. Allow me to illustrate: During the start of our coaching session, a client believed she was not a good mother, despite the countless things she did for her kids. She loved her children immensely and was fiercely committed to breaking trauma patterns she experienced growing up. After challenging this belief, she listed ten ways in which she nurtured, cared for and supported her kids. She knocked the legs out and stacked the good.

  • Who supports you and can provide evidence? In what way(s). List them.

  • Gather success stories. Who has achieved similar goals or adopted empowering beliefs that you can emulate?

  • Its time to break through chains of self-doubt.

REFLECTION

It is time to reflect upon the work you have done.

Action Steps:

  • What new possibilities and opportunities can open when you let go of these limiting beliefs?

  • List the emotions now that you have completed the action steps?

  • What steps will you take to continue to cultivate a growth mindset and focus on abundance?

If you a running a blueprint of your life that you did not create, it is time to re-write your story! It is time to breakthrough the limitations. It is time to become the person you were born to be.

To learn more about the topic covered in this article and explore additional coaching resources, please reach out to Empowering Life Coaching & Consulting, LLC:

Robbins, T. (2024). Tony Robbins Quotes About Beliefs. AZ Quotes. https://www.azquotes.com/quote/1090123

Ford. H. (2024). Henry Ford. Quotes. Quotable Quote. https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/978-whether-you-think-you-can-or-you-think-you-can-t--you-re